A poem by a Cal Poly Pomona - Urban Planning professor:

“Mayor Grinch looked down at the Cal Poly Planners
Said I know what they’re after despite their good manners

With their plans and their maps why don’t they come clean
Their real intent is to make us all green

Talk of waste and all of these threatening gasses
Water conservation, plans for the masses

All this new urbanist stuff, I don’t like it at all
I love driving my car
I love living in sprawl

No one knows why he thought like he did
Maybe a small heart or abuse as a kid
Or maybe his brain was just twisted that way 
From the years that he spent at UCLA

A mean thought came to him amid GIS
I will fool them this year
For the plans i’ll vote yes
For theres no way that they’ll change things
No way they will work
And under compactness many things lurk

So the plans were passed and went into effect
And the great things that happened he didn’t expect
GHG’s went to zero and buildings went LEED
And the economy prospered and met every need

Aand the people walked and walked
How they walked walked walked walked
And they talked and they talked 
How they talked talked talked talked

All the people came to know all of their neighbors
While chatting on porches after their labors

At jobs very near where they lived, shopped, and prayed
All the uses were mixed, close to home they all stayed

All the children were above average and did what they should
And car dealers were shuttered and then closed for good

All the the people were happy as they came to see
The form and the function of home sweet home, TOD

And the ice caps stopped melting and the defecit shrunk
Rational planning prevailed and the Tea Party SUNK

If you believe that this is not a Tall Tale 
I have magic beans and a nice bridge for sale

But maybe just maybe green planning will be
For all things can be done with a Cal Poly Degree

So lets welcome each other each other with good cheer
For we can be happy that we are all here”

By Jerry Mitchell